Let It Out

it's so not lit that it's actually dark

don't you mean...


DANK??!!!

sorry not sorry

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I'm feeling unwell lately, and so today I laid down at about 9:15 PM in hopes that I would sleep like a baby and feel much better. Well, when I did, I had this dream where I was left alone with just my little brother (as well as my sister's dog, which we were jointly asked to look after) for a week while my sister and parents went away on a trip. Meanwhile there were guests in my house who borrowed our rooms, so my brother and I ended up sleeping on the couches in the living room. It was winter, and we needed heaters to keep us warm enough. I could not fall asleep during one of those nights, with simulation feelings of being left out and being cold and uncomfortable. The next morning, while I cleaned the house for the guests, I received a video call of the rest of my family enjoying a beach in Cuba. During the call, my father announced that they plan to stay for another 3 weeks. I pretended not to mind, but as soon as I hung up, I was ready to start thinking why I was left out like this and all that, for a whole winter month. Secretly, I was begging "no, please come back... "

I tried to cheer myself by chatting on Skype, only to find all my friends were also busy having fun in another part of the world.

I woke up shortly after, hoping I at least slept for a decent amount of time. It was 11:51 PM. It's just over an hour since I woke up, and now I can't fall asleep again. Now I legit want to cry...

I feel like such an annoying crybaby who happens to be sick


Fun fact: As soon as I type "I'm feeling" on my phone, the next three suggested words are "pretty", "cute", and "silly". Not once have I ever typed any of that following "I'm feeling". So I couldn't help but notice how odd that was. It happened again while I typed this last paragraph on mobile

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So I lose a friend of mine I've been friends with for over 15 years over shit between him and my brother over a game they don't even play anymore. He decided it would be cool to take it out on me despite having nothing to do with things.

Just... fuck.

On a better note, me and my boyfriend have been going out for 5 months now. Just when I think I can't love him anymore, the next day happens. ♥

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Dawww that's nice. :3

@NewbStepper Oh gosh...

I'm very sorry to hear for your awful dream and your sickness, and I hope you get well soon. Personally I think instead of "oh yeah, it's fine!" you should've let your family know that you needed them back, that the guests were pushing you around and making it very difficult for you to sleep. Of course, it's very difficult to control your dreams and most of mine end in doom and disaster, it's not fun. (keyword: most. some are actually really pleasant.)

So I felt the urge to actually turn on my computer and write replies, since I was completely incapable of falling asleep in the last 6 hours. I sure had a rough night... despite feeling tired, there was nothing I could do. I swear, it feels just like last Saturday when I had to get up early and travel for 2 hours to get to my GMAT exam, which I could have done better (not that it didn't go well) if I was in better condition. Might as well take a really long bath (and some medication) after this...

Definitely reminds me of one of my friends who started to take drugs one day and got upset at me about trivial things that I didn't personally get involved in... yeah, I'm sorry man. It must be heartbreaking losing such a long-lasting friendship. You deserve better than this. I'm sure you will find new friends but I know it's difficult to replace something like that. Hang in there.

Aww, it's always nice to read this! I'm happy for you both.

Well, thank you. That's much appreciated. I don't know why I'm like this lately...

To be fair, when I have a problem, I usually let people know. But because dreams tend to start in the middle of nowhere, not even I know the full context of what's been happening. If memory serves me right, doctors recommended my sister and parents to have a getaway for at least a week for some reason, which is why they went. The guests that were occupying my home were actually my brother's friends, who needed to stay over for projects and things like that and could not commute so easily in the winter. Believe it or not, I permitted them to stay. They were mainly respectful, but they needed the space. None of them really pushed me around. I was taking care of their garbage and dishes, though.

By pretending not to mind, I didn't exactly go "oh yeah, everything is fine!" I just simply tried not to complain, and explain in plain terms that I've been having a hard time, but if they really need to stay for that much longer, they should. I merely tried to be a team player who understands that the annoyance the whole situation was causing me is insignificant compared to whatever the rest of my family needed at the time. As much as I like my concerns to be heard, I did not want them to feel so bad for me that they'd cancel everything and return, let alone feel that I was being selfish. I mean, perseverance builds character, or so they say, right?

What truly annoyed me in all of this was that I had a dream where I had difficulty falling asleep and getting on with life, to wake up 2 and a half hours later realizing such difficulty. Yeah, it blows!

I'm also sorry to hear most of your dreams end in doom and disaster. Ouch. I hope you think more positive thoughts before going to bed. It helps a lot usually. As for myself, I usually look forward to falling asleep because I have a more pleasant time in those clouds than when I'm awake... today was an exception.


With that out of the way, I'm hoping today will be a fresh start. Some hot water in a tub sounds good right about now!

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Reality is shit, that's why I live in a fantasy world.

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It's awful how you lost your friend for such a poor reason, but I'm happy that you two have been able to be together for a significant amount of time! Meanwhile, I had spent my birthday contemplating how to make anything come out of a hopeless crush of mine...

(Sorry that I can't add anything to the dream dilemma, but the dreams that I recall lack significance...)

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I'm sorry to hear about all of you guys going through the problems you're going through. Here's some inspiration: I even went through many tough situations. I used to think things were "impossible", until I started thinking "I'm possible" and growing stronger and stronger. You can do the same thing. You gotta believe in the power of love.

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GO FOR IT M9! TALK TO HER!

That's how I got my girlfriend. I love her so much and she makes me so happy! All I had to do was talk to her...

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Why would you say it's hopeless, though?

And as a result, one of the best things that ever happened on ZIv happened today.

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My life summed up in a sentence. I could have crushes on fifty guys and none of the fucking things will amount to anything.

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So I'm sure people has noticed me being a lot nicer and more positive. I can explain myself...

While watching wrestling last night (btw HOLY SHIT Dean Ambrose beat John Cena), I saw a Coke Cola commercial, and it was like a mini music video. One of the lyrics I heard in my head was "If you give a little love, it'll all come back to you" and yeah... I thought about the people who used to have beef with me, and how I had my little secret society (known as the Ham World Order) try to take down our problems, and yeah...I felt like it was time to end all feuds, treat people the way I want to be treated, and spread the positivity that is... the power of love. You gotta believe in the power of love.

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Power of hate for the Bullet Club, I suppose.

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Well if you find that special someone, take my advice.

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Trust me, I've tried.

Multiple times.

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http://blog.angryasianman.com/2016/08/watch-now-films-and-shows-by-about-or.html
please support, help hollywood know, otherwise they won't know



tired of all the sequels and trendy shit tbh

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Hollywood isn't going to listen.

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well just make these movies make money

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