The Wrestling Thread

PRESHOW BONANZA
Ruby Riott vs Bayley - 2.5/5 BATTLE OF THE BOOTY
the saving grace of this match is that one bit of Ruby's tush poking out that made this a preshow match absolutely worth viewing. Outside of that, Bayley was off her game, botched a couple of spots. Bayley speared Liv Morgan off the apron to the floor, Riott kicked Bayley and landed a Riott kick and pinned for the win. decent kickoff match.

REAL SHIT
1. Seth Rollins vs The Miz (Intercontinental Championship) - 4/5 YOU COULD HAVE STOPPED WATCHING AFTER THIS MATCH
WOW, what a fucking great start to a PPV, surely it will only get better from here, i'm just kidding. I know it gets tiring seeing people kick out of finishers and big moves over and over, but these two were countering each other's big moves repeatedly and landing finishers that you genuinely thought would be the end of the match. Like I was fucking blown away when that late match counter by The Miz into a Skull-Crushing Finale did not end the match, god damn. Rollins sold his knee like a madman throughout, what a legend. Kicked out of two SCFs from The Miz, was almost a third, avoided it, and later finally managed to land a Curbstomp after like 10 reversals. NICE.

2. Nia Jax vs Alexa Bliss (RAW Women's Championship - 2/5 BABYFACE GIANT vs MEGAHEEL SHRIMP
Beginning of the end, here we go. Uhh Alexa Bliss tries to get the quick advantage on Nia but then she along with the entire arena remembered she is half the size of Nia and was killed. Nia destroyed her for 10 minutes, besides this one spot where Alexa knocked her over the ropes and I thought Nia would smash her head off the apron or the steps. Fans did not give a shit about this match. Nia injured Alexa at some point, shocking, possibly on the finish but I don't care cause this was a dumb match.

Nia talked about how this win was for everyone that was bullied and that people should stand up to their bullies, nobody cared and the boos grew louder the longer it went on as it became more of an advertisement for the "BE A STAR" campaign. I don't think they expected this, maybe change the direction for your champion since this angle doesn't work. Maybe begin to understand that Nia Jax is better booked as a dominant heel/face but not a babyface that has to fight the bullies much, much smaller than her that she could fucking destroy in two moves. How the fuck am I supposed to suspend my belief that Alexa Bliss could beat Nia Jax?

3. Jeff Hardy vs Randy Orton (United States Championship) - 2.5/5 A MATCH THAT ABSOLUTELY HAPPENED I THINK
As I look as some of these ratings, some of them confuse me. I gave this 2.5/5, and i'm not sure if that's because it was a good RAW match or because it was a bad PPV match. rewatching bits of it, i'm still not sure. Match is slow as molasses, I understand that Randy moves at this pace all the damn time, and i'm sure he and Samoa Joe could put on a rest hold clinic for an hour, but FUCK this is stupid. Fans don't give a shit, RUSEV DAY LADS. Jeff came out of nowhere outside the ring at one point and just blasted Orton on the barricade, was a neat spot. Match ends almost out of nowhere, Jeff lands a twist of fate and then a Swanton, landed pretty rough on Orton. So I guess this was an ok match, but that's it. #RUSEVDAY

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The Elias segment was the second, and last, great thing to grace this dumpster fire of a PPV. It got a bigger sustained pop than THREE TITLE MATCHES, and was better received than both main events.
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4. Daniel Bryan vs Big Cass - 2/5 YOU CAN STOP AT JUST ONE, PLEASE GOD
You can't tell me this isn't intentional. Someone at WWE just admit you're doing this camera angle on purpose. Thank fuck this was 7 minutes, for the sake of the crowd and the men in the match. Big Cass sucks at selling and looking like a dominant force in the ring, they spent 90% of this match trying to make him look strong, and then ya boy D-Bry tried to put him in a yes lock, basically fed him his arm, and Cass fucked up where he was supposed to fight out of it the first time, then finally did it, was put into the lock, and tapped within a millisecond. PISS OFF. It's like watching a slightly more mobile Diesel in the ring but eternally green. Crowd was mildly into the match, then Big Cass attacked Daniel Bryan, and the crowd all but died upon realizing yes, yes we are getting more of these fuckers in the ring, doing more of these matches with very poor execution, and none of it is Bryan's fault.

5. Carmella vs Charlotte (Smackdown Women's Championship) - 1.75/5 ASK👏HER👏REF👏
No one is allowed to be proud of their participation in this match. You dumbed down the pace of the match because Carmella isn't very good in the ring, made her scared to square off with Charlotte, but then she lands a kick and is suddenly dominating the pace of the match and fully capable of winning clean with only a mild amount of struggle. I thought I was watching a mid-2000s throwaway women's match on smackdown for a moment, it was genuinely terrible at times. Charlotte missed a moonsault and sold her knee when it buckled, and Carmella won by kicking Charlotte in the hamstring and pinned her CLEAN. ASUKA LOST TO CHARLOTTE, AND NOW CHARLOTTE HAS LOST TO CARMELLA TWICE IN A ROW. I'm so unsure if this is better or worse than the previous match.

This was the hottest crowd in the country like 2 hours ago and now everyone is dead as shit, because they just watched three horrible matches in a row live when they could have just waited until Monday night to do that.

6. AJ Styles vs Shinsuke Nakamura [NO DISQUALIFICATION] (WWE Championship) - 3.25/5 YOU BLEW IT! YOU HAD IT ALL AND YOU BLEW IT!
Early on in the week I thought about how No-DQ still allows for a no contest finish, but I dismissed that thought entirely since nobody besides Russo would ever consider booking back-to-back title matches that result in nobody winning. TURNS OUT I'M WRONG AND RUSSO FOUND HIS WAY INTO WWE BOOKING ONCE MORE. It's a tragedy this match ended this way, since for the bulk of it you had a solid bout. Nakamura looked really dominant and was a tremendous heel, any moments early on that AJ went to find some kind of momentum was halted by Nakamura immediately. Nakamura landed a low blow and shortly thereafter Styles finally, FINALLY, retaliated with one of his own. Later on was THE spot of the night, Nakamura went for the Kinshasa, and Styles launches a chair brought in earlier towards Nakamura, smashes off of his knee and rebounds back towards Styles, hits him near the eye. You can't practice these things like you do bodyslams and relatively safe bumps, you just do them, that was nuts. Speaking of nuts, They both went for a kick to the nuts, both went down hard and the ref decided that the match couldn't continue, cue the entire crowd quitting on the remainder of the show. I thought it was strange from the get go that this wasn't a main event match, that it was behind two other matches, and there was the reason, another fucking finish where nobody wins. The crowd loved this match until they realized that this was going to end with no winner, and then they hated every bit of it and fell back into an eternal state of death.

7. Braun Strowman and Bobby Lashley vs Kevin Owens and Sami Zayne - 1.75/5 IF YOU LEAVE NOW, YOU CAN BEAT THE TRAFFIC

I think if you had this on much earlier, not before the main event, not after the WWE Championship, and on a PPV with quality matches, maybe I give a shit about what you have to offer here. I just don't care, nobody cared, the announcers didn't care and nobody knew who was legal at the end. Y'know what though, it's all over, it's 11:04 EST, we can finally lea-aAHHH THERE'S ONE MORE MATCH TO GO FUCKING HELL. Also, remember when Nia Jax was essentially shilling the crap out of the Be A Star Anti-Bully thing WWE does, how you should never let people bully you, then several matches later we have Strowman and Lashley beating up Owens and Zayne post match for an eternity and somehow we were supposed to cheer for this? YOUR CONTINUITY SUCKS.

This show was so bad the most over man in the promotion, Braun Strowman, could not get a single pop from the crowd.

8. Roman Reigns vs Samoa Joe - 2.25/5 SAMOA JOE, THE MAN OF 1004 HOLDS
Before the match even started, Samoa Joe beat up Reigns outside the ring for like 5 minutes, because we all need this to go on much, much longer, this has been up to this point an absolutely stellar PPV, and I would hate for it to be short on time. Please, make it go on forever Señor Joe.

The crowd vehemently hated Roman when he came out, even before he came out because they muted the boos beforehand, and by the time 10 MINUTES OF SAMOA JOE CHINLOCKS went by, they hated both of them. My guess is they thought if Samoa Joe just does restholds for a long time, they'll boo him and get behind Reigns, instead the fans destroyed the match because they hated every aspect of it, they boo'd, they left early, CM PUNK, BORING, BEAT THE TRAFFIC, RUSEV DAY chants were echoing throughout the building. Y'know what though, let's talk about the actual match. I know Samoa Joe was doing a lot of holds, eventually turned into a traditional match with some decent spots. Reigns hit a nice spear, looked like that would be the finisher but Joe got his foot on the rope. Best spot was the elbow suicida by Samoa Joe, that was really good. Traded near falls a couple times, Roman looked dead then kicked into Cena mode and regained all his energy and speared Joe, 1-2-3 pin. There are photos from inside the fucking building of people flooding towards the exits way before and as the match ended, and, in a moment of time that i've never witnessed before with any PPV or wrestling show, immediately after Reigns pinned Samoa Joe, when they panned to the crowd to get reactions like usual, all you saw was people fleeing their seats and rushing for the exits, just trying to get the hell out of the and beat traffic. I was too tired at the time to really grasp how incredible that was at the time.

This was one of the worst PPVs of all time. Not WWE exclusive, like wrestling in general, one of the worst. You have ONE high quality match and then everything else is below average and then one has yet another finish with no winner. It's very rare that you see a card put together that is just this bad and is scripted so poorly. Rollins and The Miz do not belong on this PPV, that match was far too good to be on here.

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That’s waaaay more of a review than this PPV deserves. I’d personally just give it a two word review: Shit Sandwich.

Well...yikes. I'd change the colours to brown here to reflect the effluent we just watched but that would require far more effort than it's worth.

CARD PREDICTIONS (WORTH THREE POINTS EACH):
Braun Strowman and Bobby Lashley vs. Kevin Owens and Sami Zayn: The obvious team. This was the under-main event for some reason.
Nia Jax (c) vs. Alexa Bliss for the Raw Women's Championship: Nia Jax, who managed to get the audience to boo anti-bullying. Well done you, now turn heel again.
Carmella (c) vs. Charlotte for the SmackDown Women's Championship: Carmella...cleanly. Remember when we said "whoever beats Asuka's streak is gonna be set for life"? Yeah.
Jeff Hardy (c) vs. Randy Orton for the United States Championship: Jeff Hardy, with all the energy of a shot horse.
Seth Rollins (c) vs. The Miz for the Intercontinental Championship: Rollins retains in an actual good match.
Daniel Bryan vs. Big Cass: Daniel Bryan. Which was underwhelming, and sadly the feud isn't done. Hmm.
Roman Reigns vs. Samoa Joe: Roman Reigns, although nobody knows for sure because we all left halfway through.
AJ Styles (c) vs. Shinsuke Nakamura - No Disqualification match for the WWE ChampionshipDOUBLE TKO, NOBODY WINS. That includes both the wrestlers and the audience.

SPECIAL PREDICTIONS (WORTH TWO POINTS EACH):
Strowman Match: who gets the pin on who? (1pt for each): Lashley pinned KO. Nobody saw this coming.
R-Women's: How long will the match last? (2pts for closest guess, bonus point for anyone within 60sec): 10m16. A lot of people went for 10 so big points earned here, but HTK continues his dominance, out by only 14 seconds.
S-Women's: Will the IIconics directly be involved in the conclusion of the match?: No. They didn't appear at all. what
US: Will Jinder Mahal interfere?: No, he stayed at home. The worst PPV of the year and Mahal wasn't in it. WOW.
IC: How many RKOs will Randy dish out?: NONE!
Bryan Match: How many Big Boots will Bryan take to the head?: NONE!
Reigns Match: What comes first, the Spear or the Superman Punch?: Superman Punch, apparently. Did anybody see the match? I'm sure the audience didn't.
WWE: How long will the match last? (2pts for closest guess, bonus point for anyone within 60sec): 21m05. Ham misses out by seconds on a bonus, but Quickman ends HTK's streak! Mokou just misses out on the 3pts, with 35 out to Quickman's 28.
Which match will run longer, the Reigns match or the WWE title match?: We were all right, WWE was longer by three minutes.
Which match will Bleacher Report give the best grade to?: OF COURSE the IC match gets an A. The WWE match got a B+ by the way. And if you Google "Stockholm Syndrome" you get Bleacher Report.
Which match will Bleacher Report give the worst grade to?: A whole lot of Ds tonight. US and S-Women's matches receive Ds, whilst Reigns and the Braun matches both get D+.



The Streak Is Over. Except for the one where I come last at shithouse PPVs. That one is very much alive.

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Fucking goddamn my life

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Bah, grats to Mokou. At least we don't have another PPV for another month. Unless the Saudi's offer Vince more $ to do Greatest Backlash next week.

I'm a mid-carder for life I think. At least until I stop being ass at predicting timings ahaha.

But yeah PPV sucked and I would've been fuming had I stayed up til like 4/5am for it.

-looks at how awful I've done since Mania-

Wow. This sucks, man lol

Money in the Bank is gonna be a fun one (mostly because I'll be in attendance)

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of all PPVs to win, has to be this one

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MY ANKLE WAS INJURED, THAT'S WHY I LOST.

I'M GETTING A BRONZE KNEE PAD AND WINNING THE NEXT PREDICTION GAME.

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I DON'T EVEN WANT IT

KEEP THE VICTORY, IT HAS SHIT STAINS ON IT

I'd just like to say, that I will append my review of Backlash. After watching it back, Joe/Reigns was NOT one star.

It was 0.25.

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If anyone is interested, John Morrison is going to be on the next season of US Survivor. Saw him on the trailer for it after the current season finale. Yes, I realise it’s levels of niche upon niche posting on a music game forum about a wrestler being on a reality show, but it’s possible there’s a few John Morrison marks on here.

The longest ever 5* Wrestling Champion!? Praise be!

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How do you guys react to Enzo Amore coming off as innocent? Keep in mind, Enzo was fired 'for not telling WWE management about the accusations' but come to find out, Enzo himself didn't even know a thing about it either! I also assumed Enzo was innocent this whole time, and now that the court confirmed it, what do you guys think? Does Enzo Amore deserve another job at the WWE?

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I believe that Enzo is innocent. And that is all I have to say about the matter.

Also, I'm going to throat-fuck you all at MITB. REGARDLESS OF THE FACT I HAVE AN INJURED ANKLE.

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I mean from all the talks enzo is a bit of a twat
but im fine with enzo being innocent of a crime he never did

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Enzo is an absolute cunt, that much is known.

He was a douche to everyone in the locker room and got kicked out of the locker room for it.

However much of a cockfuckshitface he is, he has been ruled not guilty of rape, so we should not act like he's a rapist.

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The cunt that accused him made Enzo look like a saint and based on the text messages that leaked, there was no way he was going to get convicted. Not interested in seeing him back on the roster, but if he went back to 205 Live I wouldn’t give a shit since I don’t watch it anyways.

To be fair, 205 live is a better show since drake maverik appeared. Not that he is a big influence on the show, but shortly after enzo was released and drake was appointed, HHH took over 205s creative. Overall a better show than in its 1st year.

Enzo will do fine on the indies/TNA

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If Enzo Amore went to TNA/GFW, holy shit that might help the ratings.

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